Cats are a strange breed of animal. Like dolphins, it seems as though the only thing they lack some days in comparison to humans is the ability to talk. They're mean, spiteful, lazy; I could go on and on. Cats are basically a combination of many people's worst traits.
I haven't read anything this funny involving a cat since Mark's post about turning thirty. Definitely worth a read, as are many of the other things "Bob" writes.
There's only one master of this house, you punkass little bitch, and he's the man who buys the groceries and pays the rent. We've got less than two weeks left together, and if you can't get this through that noxious fume-emanating head of yours during that time, I may have to make my own statement.